Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, “how many readers can I estrange THIS week??” TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else’s!
I have a very odd, specific way of sleeping. I start by lying on my right side with a pillow between my knees, two pillows under my head, and my left arm hugging either my teddy bear or yet another pillow. Eventually I fall asleep and roll onto my back. Not long after, I'll wake up (because I cannot sleep on my back), roll over onto my stomach, pull the covers over my head, and fall back asleep.
This makes spooning, cuddling, or any sort of cutesy-with-someone-else-in-bed crap impossible.
Earlier this week BDubz, Voice of God, and I had made cheddar potato soup for dinner. Apparently this particular dish does not bode well for my digestive system. The cheesy, carby goodness that I consumed was still doing some knarly things to my insides when I went to bed, but I figured I would feel better in the morning.
Then it happened.
I woke up on my back… rolled over onto my stomach… pulled the covers over my head…
and dutch-ovened myself.
(Soup mix: $7. Target Comforter: $45. Unintentionally asphyxiating yourself with your own noxious gasses: Priceless.)
PS - I posted my first work over at Nothing Rhymes with Orange... go check it out!